Anna Daniels
“Soulmates,” the tenth episode of Parks‘ third season, has plenty of delightful moments, including a cookoff between Ron and Chris (Rob Lowe) to determine whether red meat or lean meat is better (unsurprisingly, it’s red meat). The reason everyone remembers the episode, though, is definitely the talking head spot in which Tom lists all of his nicknames for everything from food to household appliances. After Leslie inexplicably achieves a “soulmate-level match” with one of Tom’s many online dating profiles, she offers to take him to lunch, figuring it might not hurt to see why they matched in the first place. Tom’s first question is if there will be “apps and zerts,” and from there, one of Parks and Recreation‘s best moments was born.
In Tom’s talking head, he rattles off several of his nicknames at warp speed and wins over audiences forever. As he explains, “‘Zerts’ are what I call desserts. ‘Tray-trays’ are entrées. I call sandwiches ‘sammies,’ ‘sandoozles,’ or ‘Adam Sandlers.’ Air conditioners are ‘cool blasterz’ with a Z; I don’t know where that came from. I call cakes ‘big old cookies.’ I call noodles ‘long-ass rice.’ Fried chicken is ‘fry-fry chicky-chick.’ Chicken parm is ‘chicky-chicky-parm-parm.’ Chicken cacciatore? ‘Chicky-catch.’ I call eggs ‘pre-birds’ or ‘future birds.’ Root beer is ‘super water.’ Tortillas are ‘bean blankies.’ And I call forks … ‘food rakes.'”
Before long, this became one of Parks and Rec‘s most famous moments, and even spawned its own website. If you’ve ever used a silly food nickname, you clearly have Tom Haverford to thank.
Written by: Looper
